True friend.. does it exist?
Well I didn't mean any harm with such an entry. I do have a lot of amazing friends. I almost likely to appreciate all of their existence, but true friend huh... I have no idea for such definition. I actually came across this photo of my friend with bunch of her girls..they kinda attached to each other or most of people would stated as a SQUAD. Inseparable right...if its in usual American culture, Sorority sister could be the best example for that. Still, the question is..are these people really a true friend?
I realized such a true friend its hard to achieved. Its not that I don't have one but I believe true friend is your true self. Yourself is the realest true friend of yours. No matter how gooodd you hang out with someone, there will always a side of part of yourself that nobody knows... not even your parents, friends, bestfriends, boyfriend or husband. I mean come on... did you "nakedly" expose yourself to somebody and these people gave a fuck? Hahahahha. There will always a side of human beings ....being selfish. or.. in softer word, self-love. People usually gave a fuckkk when you bring benefits to them. Thats the fact bruuhhh. I accept that. I started to see things clearer when I was graduated last year in November... I came out from the Hall after finish the ceremony, and.. everyone was either with their friends or family and all I was..standing. Carrying my bags, heavy robe with blister legs (heels kills). I stared most of them realizing, I am alone. I don't have friends taking photos with me, handing flowers and etc. Well it doesn't mean having somebody appreciatingg your 3 years effort is the prove that their your true friend but somehow I felt I was the most loneliest person for few hours. I even walked on my own go to nearest food stall to find some foods (also a friend nearby so that I'm not that alone while having my dinner for that day).
People would question me, "where's your parents?"
Well.. since my mum was recently had her surgery at that moment, I don't want to burden her and my dad (who have knee injury) and I went to the ceremony on my own. While others happily with their family, friends, lover.. I mostly don't have those nearby at that moment. So yeah I feel out-stand (well I am outstanding LMAO) for moment of it.. Sad but at the same time I was happy as well. I feel those warm around me. The vibes.. are pretty lovable.
Some deniable pricks would say "nah this bitch is an attention seeker" but heyyy, you're a hypocrites if you're saying that because you're deniable as fuck said that you hate such attention but then again.. who in the earth would not want their love one be there for them for such day?! Who the heck did not want beloved and being nurture by their family and friends for such an efforts?
But whatever it is... what does true friend definition for you?
I love myself. Thats All! . underline bold italic
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